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my martha season

Happy Friday, friends! First post of 2026 and I thought I would get out of my comfort zone a bit by sharing my first reel on socials lol! Not only is this week the first post of the new year, it’s also my first full week back on a school schedule. Just the usual – two jobs, a little bit of babysitting, classes, hobbies that include gym time and coffee/lunch with friends/mentors, serving in church, and a brain that thinks in tabs (which are open 24/7). These are the times that make me feel proud and overwhelmed at the same time – like “Yay, look at me!” + “Lord, I may crash out!”

As the video on Instagram shows, joy is obviously the main point here, but before that moment of excitement came a wave of anxiety. This post will be much shorter than my typical blogs, and there’s not necessarily a passage in Scripture we’ll be studying today, mainly just personal God winks in my life from this week:

My church does 21 days of prayer and fasting every January as a body. I have never fasted food before, but this year I decided to try it. I’m only fasting food from 9am-6pm, but for someone who eats nearly 5 meals a day, this has been pretty tough. Today makes Day 12 for me.

I wanted to mention this because what has surprised me most in these twelve days is how I feel by the end of the day. I’m talking 20x more energy, mental clarity, increased confidence. I’m seeing 2 Corinthians 12:9 come into action, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Because fasting has a funny way of exposing what we lean on and reminding us of what sustains us. It’s almost like my body is learning, “You don’t run the show,” and my spirit is learning, “God does, especially in your weakness.”

In addition to the Lord giving me physical and mental strength every single day, He’s also been meeting me exactly where I am. Wednesday morning, I woke up around 4:37. I planned to be awake for 4:00 on the dot so I could get ahead on my day and studies. My first thought after I woke up later than expected was to rush and quickly get dressed to start my to-do list for the day so I could be “on schedule.” But something in me whispered to just be still first.

Even though everything around me was yelling, “Do 50,000 things right now,” I chose stillness with Jesus first. And if I can be honest, not a typical Layla move. I flipped to a random page in my Bible, and the Lord met me exactly where I felt tension.

Luke 10:38-42: “38 Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. 39 And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. 40 But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” 41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, 42 but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”

The literal story where Martha is stressed and busy and doing the most while Mary is sitting at Jesus’ feet. What Martha was concerned about wasn’t wrong or sinful, it’s just loud. The problem was how her serving interfered with her interior – distracted, anxious, resentful. Jesus is basically warning us that prioritizing productivity can pull us out of presence.

I also noticed here where anxiety speaks. Martha asks Jesus, “Lord, do you not care…?” Anxiety didn’t just cause Martha to stay focused on the wrong thing, it also made her assume she was alone in her worries. And Jesus doesn’t shame her or tell her to stop serving. He gently calls out the fact that she was troubled about many things and exposes the one thing that could calm her.

Last night, I got home exhausted and extremely overwhelmed. The 500 tabs open in my brain, anxiety of a new routine, pressure of feeling like I’m already three weeks behind when it’s only Day 4 of the semester. That same “Martha” pressure followed me all the way into the evening.

I took a moment of silence, turned on worship music on my TV, and then decided to dance. At 9:30pm. For an hour. With my dog. I took a video of us that I wanted to just keep for myself, but something about it felt too real to keep hidden.

The part I don’t want to forget about this night is that any anxiety I had vanished. Not because I checked off everything on my to-do list. Not because everything in my life suddenly became calm. Not because everything turned perfect. It disappeared because I chose worship first. I chose joy first. And joy met me there.

Jesus doesn’t just meet us in the “productive” moments. He meets us in the tired moments, the hurting moments, the hungry moments during our fasting, the “I don’t have time for this” moments, the worship dance party moments with your dog in your living room.

My biggest reminder to you this week, friend: joy doesn’t wait for perfection. Joy doesn’t have to be something you only experience when life feels quiet or easy or ideal. Choosing joy isn’t denial, it’s not fake, and it’s not an “I’m fine” when you’re not. It’s the constant reassurance that says, “Even here, God is good. Even now, I am loved. Even in the chaos, His presence is peace.” Before joy can become a feeling, it must first be a choice.

Something else I want to leave you with from Luke 10: “the good portion will not be taken away”. What we receive in Jesus is untouchable. The chaos, stress, hunger, anxiety, fear, shame, pain, confusion, waiting are all real, but peace and joy in His presence are not fragile. What He’s given to you will not be removed, hidden, or stolen.

Friend, if your week (or your mind) looks like mine and doesn’t allow for many breaks, I encourage you to sit at His feet and watch how He meets you there. Maybe it’s a solo dance party to worship. Maybe it’s a quiet whisper. Maybe it’s a new opportunity. Maybe it’s an answered prayer. Maybe it’s just you choosing presence over productivity and letting that be enough for today. Because joy will meet you every time you choose it first.

Thank you for reading today, friends! Tia and I will be hosting worship dance parties weekly if you want to join next time!