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Singleness

Hello, friends! Since today is the day before Valentine’s Day, I wanted to talk to my single people specifically on giving encouragement to them this year!

Personally, I have been in my season of singleness for about six months. Maybe six months seems like a super long time to be in a season of singleness, or maybe you have been single for years and you think 6 months is nothing. I think we can both agree that some days, it is great, but others, we bring all of our questions to the Lord.

The first thing I began praying for when I entered my season of singleness was not be in one. Let’s be real, no one likes a waiting season. I personally don’t like waiting because I don’t know how long I’ll be waiting for. A verse I always (and still) found encouraging is Isaiah 49:23c : “Then you will know that I am the Lord; those who wait for me shall not be put to shame.”

The simple truth to this verse is that those who wait on the Lord will NEVER be put to shame. Like I said, waiting is not the most desired season for us. In the waiting, what I have come to realize is that it’s easy for us to settle. If we all really wanted something, it’s easy to settle for less than what the Lord has for us. We can never achieve better than what the Lord has for us, which is the beauty in trusting His timing. No matter how badly I want to settle for something that is out of His blessing, I know He holds better for me in my future. Something the Lord has taught me in this time alone is that it is impossible to fail or fall behind when you choose to wait for the Lord to awaken love when He says the time is right.

Like I said above, it is easy for us to only settle for less than what the Lord has for us. I think we can all agree that charging ahead with our own desires without His blessing proves that brokenness follows when we believe our way is better than His. Waiting isn’t always fun, but there is a purpose for it. God never wastes a season of waiting.

Waiting seasons are so crucial in our walk with Christ. Romans 5:3-4 tells us “We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope.” The hope we have for our future spouse comes from the God of hope. Seeking His heart in the midst of our confusion, disappointments, and pain changes our own.

When times are difficult, choose to praise Him for the opportunity to grow closer with Him. When you are hurting, choose to surrender any burden to Him. When it may look like absolutely nothing is happening and God is remaining stagnant, choose to trust that His way is better than your own.

Psalm 30:5b tells us, “Weeping may stay for the night, but joy comes in the morning.” This verse has been in my mind for the longest time. In our disappointments of not being in a relationship, this verse speaks encouragement to our confused hearts. Joy comes in the morning. How inspiring to know that we have a God who can pour out joy to us after we pour out our pain and burdens to His feet? There is joy to be found in the waiting.

Romans 8:18 tells us “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” Isn’t it so beautiful how God watches our hurt, disappointment, and wrestling, and He smiles and says to us, “You cannot imagine the joy that is coming to you.” Romans 8:18 underscores the very fact that the pain, disappointment, and confusion we are undergoing in our season of waiting cannot compare to the joy the Lord has in store for us.

No season of waiting is wasted when you walk with the God who watched over every word He has spoken. He gives us the opportunity to grow. I love looking at seasons of waiting as seasons of growth.

As a visual learner, I imagine a seed being planted in my heart in the beginning of my waiting season. This seed represents my initial step of faith, a profound trust in the wisdom of God’s path for my life. Each day, the seed in my heart grows, mirroring my deepening connection with Him. My worship to Him becomes the nourishing water, and His Word serves as the radiant sunlight. What captivated me is this intrinsic paradox: despite my eagerness to witness the small seed evolve into a flower, patience is paramount. Growth requires not only the sustenance of water and sunlight, but also the art of waiting. Nothing can grow unless you water it and wait.

I want to leave you with some encouragement. This year may be the last year you spend Valentine’s Day in a season of singleness. The Lord does not punish us with waiting. Personally, I think God loves us so much that He allows us to go through seasons of waiting. In my season of waiting, I have never been closer to Him, and I have genuinely never felt so loved. He has revealed things about myself that I never knew about me. He gave me desires I never planned on having. He desires your heart, and this season is the perfect chance to give it to Him and begin accepting His truth for your life.

I also want to encourage you with saying no other human being can give you, bless you, save you, or love you as much as Jesus does. He chose to live the perfect life knowing we would continue living in our selfish ways. He died for us knowing that we would turn our back on Him time after time again. Until a relationship with Christ is enough for us, no other relationship will be.

The desire for a future spouse was placed on your heart by God. He gave you that desire. Psalm 84:11b tells us “No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.” He is a generous God. The one thing God fails to do is fail to bless us. The word “uprightly” does not translate to “perfection” but of a committed life of righteousness and faithfulness. As long as we remain steadfast in our trust in Him, He will not hold back the goodness He has in store for us. Our faithfulness is continuously met with divine generosity.

I pray that you do not feel discouraged by other couples on this day. For the first two months of my season of singleness, I literally rolled my eyes at every couple I saw. Seriously. But abiding in the Lord has taught me to be grateful for others blessings, not envious. I also look at other couples and use their story as a testament to His faithfulness. I’ve seen what He can do for others, and I’m believing He’ll do the same, if not more for me.

Waiting comes with hurt, disappointment, frustration, and confusion, but it is the most perfect opportunity to devote your time to the Lord and who He has created you to become. A partner does not complete you, God does. Do not view this season as a season of force, but of a season of opportunity.

Thanks for reading, and Happy Valentine’s Day!